Once I had a successful blog, read by thousands. I gave it up.
Once I had a job offer to relocate to Manhattan and become a rock journalist. I gave it up.
Once I only wanted to be a celebrated academic, a great scholar of literature. I gave it up.
Once I wanted to live in Spain and never come back to this mess called America. I gave it up.
Once I vowed to never marry or have kids. I gave it up.
Once I was on the road to getting my first book of poetry published. I gave it up.
Once I decided that I'd never speak to my father again. I gave it up.
Once I had a stable job, enough money to buy a house and financial security for the rest of my life. I gave it up.
Once I thought that family was the most important part of life. I gave it up.
Am I sorry? Am I glad? Does it matter?
Not really.
It's just life. We all give things up. And we aren't always better because of our choices.
Whether I'm depressed or happy or angry or bored, I'm still here. I won't always be here.
The body has to give it up.
I have a friend & buddy, a like minded soul east of me whom I have never seen, I never will give her up.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I got that same situation with a guy who lives in that forgotten city (except on election day). I never will give him up.
ReplyDeleteI so get this.
ReplyDeleteI haven't been around in like forever. I hardly ever write in my blog, anymore, either. And I accidentally found this, here, today, when I followed a link to Linkedin... I'm hanging out at a new place, and trying my hand at short stories, instead of my usual long and drawn out tales... come visit sometime... http://shimmerrings.tumblr.com/
ReplyDeleteI haven't given up blogging after all
ReplyDeleteGod, blogger has eaten my responses 3 times to all of you guys. I'll be back when I'm a little less frustrated.
ReplyDeleteTo be human... Nothing is consistent only if we determine it to be. Nothing lasts forever too. I gave a lot of things up, and you're absolutely right - it didn't make me a better or worse person, it was just a choice I had to make at that time.
ReplyDeleteIn the end, after giving everything up, or losing it, or finding it, we are all forced to finally realize that it is what it is. I have often wondered if things are the way they are because that's the way they are supposed to be. When all is said and done, we're just riders on the storm.
ReplyDeleteThis is a test of your local blogger service. Do not be alarmed. The author doesn't wish to write a bunch of responses only to have Blogger consume the entry. In the case of emergency, FLEE FOR YOUR LIVES!
ReplyDeleteOh, boy, it worked.
ReplyDeleteSJ--Are you still blogging? I need to visit. I miss ya, bro.
Deb--I had a very strange (but good) experience that made me feel as though my life had flashed before my eyes, then it seemed as though it were an overread novel that required some response. I think that in some people's eyes, my choices make me ignorant or to the highly judgmental, a bad person--if bad means not rolling in dough and living a bit on the edge.
Foam--Thanks. How are you? I miss you too!
Mr. C: Exactly! The price of time and wisdom--and girl, you got to love your man.
Shimmerings: Wow, cool! I did look at your blog and I will start following it, once I figure out Tumblr. It looks good. Thanks for stopping by.
beep--just driving by
ReplyDeleteI guess, compared to this description, I'm a pit bull. I hate to give up anything, on anything, or on anyone.
ReplyDeleteWhen weighing what you gave up against what you got in return, I'm not so sure you're in the red.
WM--Hey, if you are still on FB, drop John a line as he is finally remembering that he has an account.
DeleteX-Dell: In retrospect, I doubt I gave up on much--it is more like moved on or changed my mind. That is really kind of you to say--sometimes I look back on the stuff I have done and I have no idea who that person used to be.
With Mom's illness it seems like I have been pulled into a vacuum. I have missed reading you, and missed writing for me. It feels like there is much I have given up, or has been pulled away from me...at times with me screaming and holding on, and at other times simply to exhausted to notice what I was losing while being overwhelmed by the needs of others.
ReplyDeleteI know there are seasons. I thank God there are seasons. I never lose what I've learned (even if I have to re-learn things every now and then). Your readers can not forget you. What you feed us via your knowledge is precious to me. If you were a rock-star-writer-literary goddess, unmarried and childless, rich and living in Spain...I don't think I would have gotten to know you, and that, for me- would have been a loss.
I Hope you have a beautiful day ~ ♥ ~